Heartache
by White Meteor
Summary: *one-shot* KaguraKyou. Ever wondered Y Kagura acts so violent? Perhaps it's not as unjustified as most ppl think. Ever thought about the pain she's in?


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Disclaimer: The FB characters are the creation of Takaya Natsuki. I've just decided to borrow them *S*

A/N: I'm so sick of hearing ppl say stuff like, Kagura doesn't truly love Kyou, maybe she shouldn't hit him so much and stuff like that. I thought about it: Y Kagura hits Kyou, is it justified, does she truly love him? And I truly thinks she does. I feel so sympathetic towards her.

So I've decided to write this fic. It's a one-shot and I hope this changes some ppl's view on Kagura a bit (I'm probably too naïve). And I couldn't think of a better title, I suck with titles. If NE1 has NE suggestions…

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Heartache

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(Kyou)

"Alright, enough with the loud music. We need some slow song. A slow erotic song, something that allows close contact and touching. After all if any of you want to achieve real manhood, the first step is-" Ayame began rummaging through the CDs.

Hatori took the mike, "Intermission."

Momiji grabbed the mike, "I'll sing a song for you all to dance to. I know lots of cool songs."

"We'll play this," Hatsuharu said sticking a CD into the CD player.

I was very nervous. I took a deep breath and went up to Tohru, "Do you-"

"She promised me the first dance," Yuki interrupted holding out his hand to Tohru and gave me a dirty look.

Tohru blushed.

I glared at him and walked away, 'Baka! I should've-'

"Kyou-kun!!! Dance with me!" Kagura shouted clinging to me.

I was really in a foul mood, I always hated Valentines and after that confrontation with Yuki…

"Let go," I said.

"But I want to dance," she said tugging on my arm, "come on. Don't be-"

"You're annoying," I said softly and toss away her arm, "don't ever touch me. Ever. I hate you."

I regretted it the moment those words came out of my mouth. I didn't really mean it. Well, not the hating part. Though she was annoying. I looked at her. Her hair cast a shadow over her face so I couldn't see her expression that clearly but she looked really serious, and really sad. I was debating whether or not I should apologize when she rolled up her sleeve, "How dare you say that Kyou!!"

Her punch began flying and I was almost relieve, 'She's ok.'

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(Hatsuharu)

Shigure was whining about the hole in the roof and strained carpets. Kyou was tending to his wounds. Everyone else just shook their head, used to Kagura's displays of violence towards Kyou.

"That was exciting, but lets get back on track. This is a Valentine Dance Party, not a wrestling match. Although, I got an overwhelming urge to scream encore," Ayame said and began blabbing again.

He was probably the best and worst MC and DJ, I ever met. But what caught my attention was Kagura running out of the house. I frowned and followed her out to the garden. Away from the music I heard soft sobbing from her. She sat hugging her knees and head bent down, 'Is she crying?'

I cough softly, "Anou…Kagura-neechan are you, ok?"

She looked up at me and I could see the tears rolling down her cheek. I never seen her cry before.

I sat beside her and though I got no clue what she was crying about, I said, "Let it all out. You'll feel better after crying."

"Kyou said he hates me…"

"I'm sure he doesn't mean it. He says things without thinking."

She wiped away her tears with the back of her hand, "I know but the stuff you say without thinking is the stuff that's true."

"…"

"He'll never say those words to Tohru. He loves her."

"That's not true…"

Kagura laughed but not in a nice way, "I'm not an idiot. You don't have to lie. I'm probably the first to know. I knew last Valentines."

"Last Valentines?"

She laughed, "I know he doesn't like sweets. But it's Valentines you're suppose to show you like the person by giving them chocolate. So I got him a 20 pound chocolate heart. I never expected him to eat it. I knew he wasn't going to. But he did. He ate all 20 pounds of it within a minute. Do you know why?"

I was pretty sure that it was a rhetorical question but I shook my head anyways.

"So he could get Tohru's gift, a tiny box of chocolate. He stuffed himself with 20 pounds of chocolate for her 20 ounce chocolate. That was when I knew," she said laughing bitterly, "I knew but I had to pretend I didn't. I had to pretend everything was ok. I had to smile and laugh. Do you any idea how hard that is? Especially when all I wanted to do was cry?"

I shook my head, "Kagura-neechan. Maybe you if you didn't…um…if you restrain from hitting him…"

"I hear that all the time. I don't want to hit him either. But I have no choice. I know you find that hard to believe right? Like you said, Kyou doesn't think before he speaks. He says whatever comes to his mind. That's what I like about him. His truthfulness. But I know he also feels immense guilt after saying or doing something mean, but he's not good with apologies. He's not like Ri-chan, and that guilt eats away at him. You know that right?"

I nodded.

"So I hit him. He's a guy. To him, we're even after I punch him. The physical abuse he gets from me, is his punishment. Therefore, he doesn't have to apologize after taking my blows. He has no clue, how much it pains me to have to hurt him. How hard it is to have to hurt the person you love. It's a cliché but I truly believe it hurts me more than it hurts him. Maybe not physically but mentally…he gets relieve, what do I get?"

Kagura was crying again, "I so tired. So tired from acting. Why does he have to love Tohru? Why do I have to love him?"

"There's no explanations. You don't have to act. You can tell him the truth."

"I tell him the truth every time I see him. I tell him I love him. I tell him I want to marry him. And he pushes me away. I've done everything I can."

"Then perhaps it's time to give up," I said.

"I want to. I wish I could. I tried forcing myself to stay away from him, to forget him. But the more I think force myself, the more I think of him. Every time I hear his name, I want to know what's happening to him, how he is, what he's doing."

I didn't know what to say to her.

She spoke softly, "You know what's most painful? I know, I know better than anyone he'll never reciprocate my feelings. Like how I'm hooked on him, he's hooked on Tohru. I know exactly how hopeless the situation is. I can't even force myself to believe I have a chance, yet I still persist. I'm holding onto a shattered dream, but I can't stop myself."

I looked at her and I could sense her pain.

She said sadly, "Sometimes I wish I never met him, because I know I'll be happier. I thought about begging Hatori to erase my memory of him, of us. But I couldn't do it. I love him too much…"

"Kagura-neechan…"

Kagura got up and said, "I can't go back in there looking like this. I'm going to go home. Tell them, I'm not feeling well and had to leave, kay?"

I nodded, "Ok."

She smiled sorrowfully, "Thanks. Don't tell anyone about what I said."

"I won't."

"Arigatou, Haru-chan," Kagura said, "bye."

"Bye…"

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(Kyou)

I frowned, 'I shouldn't have came out here…'

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The End

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A/N: Give me a review about what U think. Good? Bad? So not Kagura? *S* I might write a sequel…or not…


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